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Bizarre Situation: Two Husbands

asked 2016-08-21 06:11:25 -0500

Not at all Punjabi gravatar image

updated 2016-09-01 10:51:34 -0500

Guruka Singh gravatar image

If a woman, legally wedded to a man working as a Defence Officer who loves her a lot but after couple of years of marriage disappears from the War-Zone and there is no trace of him for the next five years. During these five years, this young desperate woman due to societal pressures gets married to another man who is equally loving like her first husband. But yet after couple of years of the second marriage, her first husband returns back to the hometown and discovers that his wife is now married to another man.

Now, in such a situation what this woman ought to do? Return back to her first love, her first husband who used to love her a lot or keep staying with a man who is equally loving. From the legal point of view she is still married to her first husband not yet divorced but morally what's correct??? Any answers, based on the beliefs of Sikhism???

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answered 2016-08-31 13:52:38 -0500

Guruka Singh gravatar image

updated 2016-08-31 14:04:50 -0500

This is a complicated situation which requires any person reading your question to make certain assumptions to "fill in the blanks."

You don't say where you live, but under USA Family Code law:

"A marriage contracted by any person during the subsistence of a previous marriage shall be null and void, unless before the celebration of the subsequent marriage, the prior spouse had been absent for four consecutive years and the spouse present had a well-founded belief that the absent spouse was already dead. In case of disappearance where there is danger of death under the circumstances set forth in the provision of Article 391 of the Civil Code, an absence of only two years shall be sufficient. For the purpose of contracting the subsequent marriage under the preceding paragraph, the spouse present must institute a summary proceeding as provided in this Code for the declaration of presumptive death of the absentee, without prejudice to the effect of reappearance of the absent spouse."

That means that the first marriage is null and void and the second marriage is valid and has been legally granted under the statute above.

Now you ask what "this woman" ought to do. The answer to this question depends a that woman's deep understanding of her own marriage and her own destiny. No one else can answer what is "right." Only she can do that. Of course re-marrying the first husband will require a divorce from the second husband.

For more on the Sikh approach to marriage please see this other recent question.

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Asked: 2016-08-21 06:11:25 -0500

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Last updated: Aug 31 '16