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Raped girl

asked 2015-10-19 19:15:20 -0500

Skaur2 gravatar image

updated 2017-07-31 11:02:40 -0500

Guruka Singh gravatar image

Hi, i just wanted to share something big. I am a 26 year old sikh girl. When i was 18 i was raped by a muslim man. I did not know him. It happened in broad daylight in a coffee shop on my 18th birthday. I told the police after 2 years but they said if it reached court that they could not stop the media coming in and the story getting out. This was a problem for me so i dropped the case. I have 7 brothers. And i did not want my family to know. I have lived with it all my life. Im now married into a strict amridhari family and i think my brother in laws would disown me if they knew even though i was a victim of this unprovoked attack. And by that i mean im not amridhari myself but im not a slaggy modren girl. I dont go out to pubs clubs ai dont wear makeup or skirts or dresses. Im a respectable girl

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answered 2015-10-20 15:55:18 -0500

gn gravatar image

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

You need to contact Sikh Helpline:

If we stand up against these people then they can never hurt any other girl again.

Read the above and contact the user jkvlondon, she went through a similar experience and Guru Sahibs kirpa she remained strong and stood up.

Sat Sri Akaal

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answered 2015-12-19 03:52:41 -0500

strongKaur gravatar image

Dear Singhni, I am so sorry to hear that you were raped and I want to tell you first off, that it wasn’t your fault, that you are a valuable human being with a pure soul, and you are really strong for making it through this. You are not alone- there are a lot of girls who have gone through this. I wanted to say thank you for sharing it with us because I know it can be hard to trust someone after you have been raped. As a survivor you should not be blamed- do not let anyone tell you that this was your fault- someone else chose to rape you. Do not let your mind tell you that you could have changed things. If you are afraid of being believed, know that God believes you and that no one else’s opinon matters. I know how hard it can be to deal with going to the police. To an outsider who hasn’t lived this, it seems like the obvious and just thing to do, and therefore it seems easy to them. I know its very hard. On one hand it is important to your safety, and the safety of other people that you go to the police and stop this man from doing it to others- he needs to know it was wrong and let justice be served. It can also provide closure. Its hard to talk about. Its hard to tell someone- I congratulate you on being able to talk to the police. Its hard to accept that it’s a part of your life, that it happened. There is the fear of revenge, there is the fear of what will people think, and whether or not they will blame you and make you feel worse about it. Its hard for people to understand that the process of filing a report with the police and getting “justice” can re-traumatize the victim. You re-live the experience when you talk about it. It can be a long process and you may not feel suppored, on top of the fact that privacy is an issue. I don’t know which country you are writing from, but even here in Canada we have a low conviction rate. So I understand that you chose to drop the case. I am hoping that you did not suffer any physical consequences as a result of the rape (pregnancy, STD, etc.). Mentally, being raped can lead to anxiety, depression, and PTSD. I cannot speak to how your family and in-laws will react as I am not in your shoes. A lot of people have stereotypes about rape. As a victim you do not deserve people telling you that you should be disowned for this. You are still a respectable woman. You are still a human being with a pure soul. Maybe he touched your body, but the soul is still gold. Remember that. I would hope that they would be understanding and prioritize ... (more)

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answered 2015-10-22 03:04:29 -0500

Not at all Punjabi gravatar image

updated 2015-10-23 14:53:13 -0500

Bhagat Singh gravatar image

You got raped by a Moslem man when you was 18 but you reported to the Police after 2 years and when they insisted that your case could draw media attention, you dropped the case. You even chose not to reveal to your family too.

Now, this is the crux of the problem with the Sikh girls. There has been number of cases in the past when Moslem men have sexually assaulted Sikh girls but the Sikh girls chose to remain silent.

The reason there is a communication gap that exists in the Sikh families between Parents and their children plus we are scared of these Moslems.

Nobody can help you out.

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answered 2017-07-26 02:36:27 -0500

Lavender_Singh gravatar image

There are countless cases happening in this world where Sikhs girls are kidnapped, drugged, and raped by Muslim men but still Sikh girls keep falling in love with Muslim men.

All of this is happening because today people who are born in Sikh families particularly amongst Punjabis are highly unbalanced, they don't get support from their Parents, they are not aware of their own Sikh faith, they get lost in Gurdwaras because they don't understand anything, they follow Sikhism out of Compulsion not out of Choice.

Young Sikh men and women of Punjabi origin are torn between Sikhism and Punjabisation. When in Gurdwaras, they are told to follow Sikhism and when they return back home they are enforced to restrict their lives within the parameters of the Punjabisation.

When Sikh girls grow up they want to make boyfriends and when they move out of their chaotic homes the world seems to be different and hence they get attracted to Muslim men and then the whole story begins.

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Asked: 2015-10-19 19:15:20 -0500

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Last updated: Jul 26 '17