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please tell which gurbani can make him mine

asked 2018-08-10 12:45:59 -0500

Kaur515 gravatar image

updated 2018-08-11 23:45:29 -0500

I request you to tell me very fast and ask god to help me

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answered 2018-08-10 21:18:07 -0500

strongKaur gravatar image

Hi Kaur, I don’t think this was simply about him going for studies. Your original post seemed to have more information than this one but my message is the same. You had said that he wanted to break up but you convinced him to wait it out. You can’t make people stay who don’t want to stay. The convincing, the extra effort, it only lasts so long if someone doesn’t want to stay. In fact, it is exhausting to love someone and have them be more and more indifferent over time while you fight more and more to keep the relationship. There is a time to fight for a relationship, for love, to make an effort and to work through differences if there are issues to be resolved. There is importance to that; both people have to be willing. I always believed strongly in that. But there is also a time in which we have to realize to let it go. Forcibly keeping someone in something they don’t want isn’t right. The other thing I have learned which I wish to pass on is that it isn’t healthy to say that you can’t live without someone. You had mentioned this previously too. We can feel deeply painful and hurt, we can find it hard to go on, but the truth is we should be able to have an independent sense of our life purpose even within a relationship. We shouldn’t be so focused on needing the other person that we lose our own path. Paath will help you find your path, all path is healing and just focus on that connection. Do an ardas and take a Hukamnama and Guru Ji will guide you. Gurbani is not about making people ours, to have someone belong to us. It is about us connecting on a deeper level than you and me. It can strengthen our relationships, but through connection to God and connection to the realization that God is in all. I personally think it sounds like in this case you need to consider preparing yourself that if he doesn’t want to stay, then you shouldn’t make him. Sometimes people find their ways back to us, and they just need their time away to themselves, but sometimes it was just the way it wasn’t mean to be. I just wanted to share with you that love is so much deeper when it comes from a spiritual place and you wouldnt have to fight so hard to keep the relationship going. Waiting is not a bad idea, but I don’t want you to hang onto the hopes for this relationship for 7 months and only find out that he still doesn’t want a relationship! You should clarify it now. He is active on whasapp, but he isn’t talking to you. Tahts a red flag. People prioritize what is important in their life. And no matter how busy ... (more)

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Asked: 2018-08-10 12:45:59 -0500

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Last updated: Aug 11 '18