Will Guru Ji forgive me? Will he still love me?
asked 2016-03-14 20:06:42 -0500

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I'm a young girl, I started watching dirty stuff online and it kept on going for almost 2 years. I regret it and regret it. I always ask Guru ji for forgiveness, but I still fall into the urges. But this time I started to slow down a bit. I stopped watching kaam but I still sometimes think about it. Now I feel really guilty for doing so! I hate myself so much on why I would get attracted to kaam! I believe in Guru ji dearly. Everyday I ask him to forgive me breaking the promises on to stop watching kaam and even watching it. I don't know if I have been forgiven or not. Sometimes I cry and feel like I'll just end up going to Hell in the end and not meeting Guru Ji at all. I love Guru Ji dearly, and I can't live life if I don't know if he loves me or not. But I have been saying waheguru a lot and doing a lot of path and reading Hukunmana. But I still feel like I don't deserve all the things in life Guru Ji has given me because I'm such a horrible sinner on watching this dirty kaam. No Sikh girl would ever do such a thing like i did. I feel so guilty and heart broken. I even feel terrible for hiding this from my parents and I'm very scared to tell them because they will hate me for the rest of my life. Please give me an answer! I need some advice!