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relationship help

asked 2012-07-20 16:13:45 -0600

anonymous user


Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru ji ki fateh!

I wanted some help in my personal life. First, I want to tell something about myself. By Guru ji's Grace, I got a blessing of Amrit and strength to walk of Guru ji's Path as much as I can. The only thing I want to accomplish in my life is that whatever kind of life I have, I want to live according to Gurmat. I want to obey and love Waheguru as much as I can. This is really the only thing that holds importance to me , nothing else.

It has been one year, I have been like best friends with a guy who is a Sikh but doesn't really have true love for Waheguru from his heart. I was always concerned about our friendship the whole time because I never wanted him to see me more than a friend. I would take Hukams from Guru Maharaj all the time about this, like if I should still continue this close friendship or not. I walked according to Maharaj ji. He did started loving me and I also couldn't ignore it any more. If it was a small crush, I would have said no to him. But honestly, he considers me the only precious thing in his life. I struggled throught alot, but Guru ji told me in Hukams that I should say yes to the relationship. Guru ji told that he will eventually become a Gursikh slowly.

But I am not happy. It kills me that I might not have a Gursikh llifestyle or household when I get married. I am not happy that I wont live in a family where everyone holds true love for Waheguru ji. This was my toppest priority when I ever thoguht about getting married in future.

He isnt really interested in Sikhi, but he tires his very best to follow whatever he can to make me happy. For Ex, he has become a vegetarian. But he does all this for my happiness, not because of Guru ji. After such drastic changes, he does feel forced from inside, but he say anything because he knows that I always wanted a Gursikh husband. He even says he is ready to take Amrit. But I stop him because he doesn't even what Amrit really is!

Right now, I am trying to accept Guru ji's Will. I think it is a "desire" that I have of living a Gursikh lifestyle that I should eliminate because we shouldnt really worldly wants and desires in us. I am working on to kill my mind and even accept if I get a life where my family is not Gursikh.

I am not sure what is wrong, and what is right. I am just wondering if I can get any suggestions from you about this. Thank you so much

Waheguru ji ka khalsa Wahegruu ji ki fateh

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answered 2012-07-26 03:22:51 -0600

Waheguru Ji ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji ki Fateh! I am not in a position to say something but when I was going through it I was astonished that how can u love a person like this which not even a Sikh. I think what u write about yourself is wrong because a Gursikh is a true lover of GURU NANAK SAHIB JI & he can't think like this te baki tuhadi marzi
Waheguru Ji ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji ki Fateh!

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answered 2012-07-23 09:49:07 -0600

Guruka Singh gravatar image

Waheguru Ji ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji ki Fateh!

You say " I want to obey and love Waheguru as much as I can. This is really the only thing that holds importance to me, nothing else."

'Obey' and 'love' are only two legs of the stool. No stool can stand on only two legs. The third leg of the stool is 'trust.'

To be a Gursikh rests within the heart and soul. If the Guru has accepted one to be His Sikh, then between that Sikh and his Guru is just a matter of time. If you marry this man, life will be difficult for you. You must be very steady in your own sadhana and your inward connection to your Guru. You must put that relationship first, before husband, children and parents. That is the only relationship that will go with you when all others leave you.

It is your steadiness, grace, constancy and courage that will let him know that the Guru is the center of your life.

Be careful. Every woman will tire of a man who wants to hug her and worship her all the time. No woman wants that. You want a man of God. When a man hugs God, then that man becomes very hugable.

If you compromise your values for benefits. You will be miserable. That is a fact.

Guru Rakha, .....G

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Asked: 2012-07-20 16:13:45 -0600

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Last updated: Jul 26 '12