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asked 2018-01-10 02:27:54 -0500

Ann gravatar image

updated 2018-01-10 13:07:45 -0500

Guruka Singh gravatar image

Sometimes ..Good friends fight then they reunite because good friends can't stay apart. But after so many arguments and contradictions people give up because they are tired of fighting over the same thing and they become estranged to each other . They do miss each other and want to talk to each other but after so many fights trust is broken . There is no enthusiasm cause both of them are heart broken . But I wanna ask if there is any way out of this situation of hesitation and formality. Can the same amount of trust be rebuilt ? Can their friendship become better ...If yes then pls suggest some .

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answered 2018-01-10 03:06:16 -0500

strongKaur gravatar image

I think fights are different in teens. You often don’t have the same level of conflict resolution skills people do later in life, and even those take time to build sometimes well into people’s marriages. I think the friendship where you are tired of fighting over the same thing is different than the occasional fight in an otherwise strong friendship. Unless something changes within yourself, or that other person, or both, you continue to have that same fight. Time can help to heal things, perspective, and realization of what you want and need from a friendship, and who you are, can help to heal.

If you are referring to your friend that we talked about earlier, I think that things are too soon for you to heal that trust, firstly. Secondly, you haven’t had enough time to even grow, gain perspective, or realize what you need, it is too fresh. Especially because you mentioned you are not enthusiastic, heartbroken, and what was happening was not healthy for you. Ignoring someone is a big break in trust, and he would really need to do a lot of work to change his behavior to repair that, and there hasn’t possibly been any time for him to change a longstanding behavior in such a short period! It didn’t sound like a healthy relationship, and I think it’s important to reflect on what it means to have a healthy friendship.

People heal when the relationship is strong. Like marriages withstand small fights, but the fights are different. These don’t erode trust, there is rather trust built over time. There are small disagreements, but an ability to see that as a whole things are good and you have the same goal. Some friendships are worth doing the healing work and sometimes you just need to part ways and learn on your own and that’s okay too. It's important to recognize that walking away in that scenario isn't the same as giving up, but rather a conscious choice for your wellbeing.

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answered 2018-01-10 04:44:35 -0500

Ann gravatar image

updated 2018-01-10 04:47:10 -0500

Thanks a lot ... For always guiding

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no problem :) Waheguru can heal any conflict if it is meant to be, it's just we have to do what is appropriate in each moment, and recognize that some relationships were only meant to have so much breath together (time together)

strongKaur gravatar imagestrongKaur ( 2018-01-10 18:47:21 -0500 )edit

Ann gravatar imageAnn ( 2018-01-10 20:45:55 -0500 )edit

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Asked: 2018-01-10 02:27:54 -0500

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Last updated: Jan 10 '18