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Confused sikh

asked 2012-11-23 19:44:54 -0500

Anonymous sikh gravatar image

updated 2013-06-04 06:53:33 -0500

Hi I am a little confused regarding Sikhism and sikh practices. First and foremost all my sikh friends and family members are clean shaven yet I am the only turbaned sikh among them, by now I am fed up of being a turbaned sikh and I desire to cut my hair, would it be okay for me to cut my hair since I am the last turbaned sikh person in my family? Secondly is it okay to trim one's beard ?, as I face this problem daily of maintaining my beard daily. I have noticed many of my friends have sikh girlfriends yet I being a turbaned sikh also desire the same like every guy but unfortunately many sikh girls want a clean shaven sikh guy as their boyfriend. Is it wrong to desire to be like every one else? Many times when I had asked this question to other Sikhs whether a sikh can have a girlfriend they all seemed to give me age old lecture that having a relationship is against Sikhism. Why do I get lectured for trying to being like others? I used to run a Sikhism based website but now I have shut my Sikhism based website down as many sikh guys and girls my age group would label me as extremist, fanatic, and also orthodox minded. While I was enthusiast towards Sikhism I was not encouraged to pursue it further, but now I have taken a decision not to wear a turban ever again as I while cutting my hair as well. I am sure many of you reading will probably feel I have taken the wrong decision well I am fed up of being singled out.

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answered 2013-12-07 22:10:06 -0500

ghuman gravatar image

Hi dear friend, I truly understand your situation because I have been there, I born in a strict sikh family, when I was younger I followed everything my parents taught and encouraged me, as I got in grade 10, I felt exactly same like you, and I was in two worlds, with time being am ended up clean shaved moderng kind of guy, I truly love Sikhism and teaching of all guru sahibaan, I cant see any other gurus or religion perfect like this, guru ji taught us so much, but basic things and easy ones are love and meditate god which is universal and same one for every person on this planet, just different way of calling. Being a proper sikh is a great thing and you can fulfill your life with great inner peace and happiness, at the same time you can't force yourself too much sticking to this way of life if it doesn't comes from inside you naturally, whatever thing's make you happy and excites you, I dnt think its any bad thing, you have to live your life the way you really want to, you cant have any regerts, if you didn't have a second thought abt being a amritdhari sikh that would be a super great thing, but otherwise 6ou are human being and you have right to choose whatever you want, it's better to be a non sikh rather than being a fake sikh, as in my case I have done everything 8 wanted and have no regrets, I still worship god in my own way, you can still love God, urself and people, you dnt need a label and anyone else's permission, thats just my experience and my point of views, am sorry if I offended anyone, I respect all and everyone's believes. But I think we can share our thoughts and opinions yeah?

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answered 2014-08-26 22:27:03 -0500

godissuperkind gravatar image

For people in a sumilar situation again ..

Watch a youtube postmortem video to know if its worth altering your sikh appearance.. It will help.

God is and shall always remain Superkind

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answered 2014-06-30 05:30:31 -0500

Bro im not amrit shak i dont have beard i dont have kase (hair) and neither do my parents, eveyday of my life i get really sad that my parents didnt make me religious im 15 years old and i got into sikhi last year trust me bro i know its really hard doing this but u have to stay strong i know u dont want to hear the same lecture over and over again but what good is a girlfriend, imagin it this way ur going to be messing around with someone elses wife i morn everyday that i was born into a more sikhi aware family. Everytime i walk into a gurdwara i feel ashamed. I dont know how to face guru granth sahib ji . Trust me its the worst feeling in the world i just cant wait till i have the readyness to be a singh ur lucky u still have a beard and hair im a disgrace i dont think you would want to be one as well. Trust me man dont cut ur hair in what face are u going to do darshan of the ten gurus i know im a screw up but doesnt mean u have to be. Dont care what people say do what is right just keep ur hair and do nitnem watch u will have the most beautyful wife in the world just please bro please dont cut ur hair

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Asked: 2012-11-23 19:44:54 -0500

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Last updated: Aug 26 '14