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2018-07-05 17:11:56 -0500 commented answer Guruka Singh personal contact

@strongKaur Is there a way that I could email you? I really want help and I don't feel comfortable with speaking to anyone.

2018-07-05 17:11:36 -0500 commented answer Guruka Singh personal contact

@strongKaur Is there a way that I could email you. I really want help and I don't feel comfortable with speaking to anyone.

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2018-03-29 19:53:09 -0500 answered a question sikhi female facial hair

Wjkk wjkf I'm your age aswell! Even I have the some similar problems to you. It's good that you keep your hair. For your upper lips, all I can say is that if you cannot find a way to stop removing the hairs then you could do some Simran (pray) and this should give you confidence.

I really don't feel that this makes you a bad Sikh. Your 14, still a child and as a teen there could be some things that make you uncomfortable. And that is totally okay. There are loads of Sikh women who are also feel the same as you right now.

However by keep on removing hair is not going to solve your problem of being uncomfortable. Hair is always gonna grow because it's natural and that's how Waheguru made us. I know what it feels like. Even yes sometimes I remove facial hair because I feel like it doesn't look right. By doing this we make ourselves more confident in the way we look. So I guess theres no real problem to this.

As of now your not an amritdhari and you don't need to worry about it. And if your gonna consider taking Amrit later in life then that is really good because hopefully at that time you would feel more confident in yourself and you will feel commitment into not removing any hairs.

For now all I can say is that this is not a big issue. Do some Simran and it will definitely help you!

Ask for some guidance at home if you still struggle but remember you are perfectly fine and it is okay feel uncomfortable with certain things about ourselves. Please don't care about what people think about you. You and I know that your beautiful :)

May Waheguru help you!!

Link below https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rgQjfcp...

The link is about a women and how she faced being buiiled about her facial hair then later accepting facial hair. This may help you, probably by confidence. It's up to you to watch the video.

:) HAVE A GOOD DAY BEAUTIFUL!

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2017-07-01 18:42:02 -0500 commented answer Trichotillomania, god answering prayers, personal question

Wjkk wjkf I can't even post anonymously because I know if I open my mouth about it on here I will get a lot of hate comments, that's why I was hoping to chat with someone in private. I know that probably no one will say anything to me on here but I feel insecure sharing about something. Wjkk wjkf

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2017-06-22 18:00:08 -0500 asked a question Trichotillomania, god answering prayers, personal question

Waheguru Ji ka Khalsa Waheguru je ki fateh! I'm 14 nearly turning fifteen in sept. I have had trichotillomania since ages, like about since I was 10 ish. Now this is under control. I've pulled the front on my hair and it's now a really small fringe so I cover that. I pull my eyelashes and eyebrows. Ive been bullied all through years 7,8,9 and im not very social. I only have a few friends like 4 good ones that accept me not matter who i am but everyone considers them dumb, weired but im not (but they are my freinds). My main problem is pulling my eyebrows. Do you know any herbal treatments for that?

I know it sounds stupid but I can't control it, either I'm not thinking to or because I don't do paath or ardaas. The reason I don't do paath or ardaas is because I think it takes ages or never for my prayers to be answered. For example; in reality I wanted a brother because I'm the only child, so last year my mum was expecting and she only went to first trimester and got an ectopic pregnancy. That's what happened when I asked for a brother. Now I don't believe that my wishes or prayers will come true.

I would want to email someone that can help me with some sex related problems. I cannot talk about it on here because I think that I will be shamed and joked about on my character. Honestly the problems not very serious and I haven't done it yet but it's about some attractions and lust. I cannot share it here. Sorry Thanks Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru ji ki fateh!

2017-05-11 18:47:43 -0500 commented answer Is it wrong to love your cousin? Why is sex before marriage considered wrong?

Thank you so much Uncle Ji. Your reply has helped me. Only a few questions. Will I be forgiven in a situation like this? If this has happened accidently either by drunk Ness, is it wrong? I know that you shouldn't drink because you cannot control yourself after that. I'm just curious on the topic.

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2017-04-18 20:52:46 -0500 answered a question Masturbation...

Lust or uncontrolled sexual desire is one of the five evils that Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji warns us about time and time again. Masturbation, also referred to as Self-Sex, involves lustful thoughts that inspires or encourages more sexual thoughts and acts, and is therefore not appropriate for a Sikh to engage in. This is mostly seen in adolescence period as they want to satisfy their sexual needs. It is for self pleasure (sexual pleasure using with own or others hands or objects).

Gurbani guides us that although a Sikh does not have sex or intimacy outside of marriage, one must also be cautious and mindful of controlling our sexual organs:

ਬਿੰਦੁ ਨ ਰਾਖਹਿ ਜਤੀ ਕਹਾਵਹਿ || “O Yogi! You do not control your seed and semen, and yet you claim (to the world) you are practicing abstinence.” (Ang 903)

In the Sikh way of life masturbation is not considered an acceptable option for quenching physical desire or sexual desire. The Sikh of the Guru has the best option to search for and find the TRUE source of satisfaction and fulfilment in life. Master your mind at this age and you will master the world while quite young.

In this forum you'll find many same answers. Just tap onto tags and find masturnation. You'll find all questions and it's answers related to this topic.
If you really want to stop from heart then Waheguru will definately help you. Also watch this video. It may help you.

It's about transforming sexual feelings. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVwmk...

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2017-04-14 16:44:32 -0500 asked a question Is it wrong to love your cousin? Why is sex before marriage considered wrong?

Sat shiri akaal, Im the same girl who posted the question of me 14 masterbating, pulling hair and having thoughts of sex. Those answers that I received helped me. I thank everyone who responded to that question. Strong Kaur helped me a lot with love.

Ive been having strong feelings for my cousin. He is basically my second cousin ( My dads dads sisters sons son). He is 14 months older than me. Me and him share great grandparents. Ever since I met him ive been having a crush on him. I've known him for loads of months now. Only my dad knows about me crushing on him. Will it be wrong for me to love him? I've even been having thoughts of marrying him. But the only problem is that he is my thaya's son. There are signs that he has feeling for me but has not confessed yet. Does the Guru Granth Sahib say who we should love or not? I've been searching all over the Internet and I still can't find an answer.

Another question... I still don't understand why sex before marriage is wrong. What if you truly love the person and you feel that what ever your doing is right. I know if I do this after a few years this will be wrong for him especially because he and I will disrespect Guru Gobind Singh Ji without his consent (marriage). But I still don't understand why this is wrong. If I have sex with someone then marry him after, what is the problem of sex before marriage in that situation. If I'm in that situation what should I do? Should I have sex or leave it for after marriage?

Thanks Wjkk wjkf

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2017-03-21 01:37:17 -0500 marked best answer I'm 14 and a Sikh girl. I watch porn, I masturbate and I want to have sex. I regret being like this

Sat Shiri Akaal, I am 14 and a Sikh girl who live in uk. I need help on how to stop having lust in my mind. I know about the five vices but I still cannot control. I've been doing this since 10ish when I started puberty. I'm still a virgin. I have been masturbatiing regularly and watching porn. Only my dad knows about this. He has said to control this, but I can't. I've stopped in between a few months but problems have started again. I've been caught watching porn and my phone history had been always checked. I've tried doing Paath, but after I felt depressed and sucidal. In my heart I really want to be a normal person. But my mind stops me all the time. Things that distract me are: school, being out of home. I talked to my dad about this whole thing, he says that I could try having a boyfriend, but be friends only. My dad is even allowing me of having sex before marriage in future. I do think that I shouldn't listen to my dad, he is only saying this because he doesn't want me doing this without him knowing anything. My dad doesn't want me to actually do this. He says that if I loose my virginity I will no longer be a vigin anymore. I am scared. I know about the Guru's teachings that this is wrong. I am so confused right now. I've been searching about this issue on the Internet for months and I finally decide to ask this on this website. I know what I am doing is really wrong and very bad. My mind doesn't want to accept. When I feel like this is so bad, then I stop watching porn and I stop masturbating, but afterwards this all turns around. I end up doing this again and again. I want to know any other ways to stop this, I know many like; doing paath, going to the gurdwara, doing seva and keeping myself distracted. This has made me feel bad about myself, and have extremely low self-esteem. I want to change schools as well, I don't know if this will help. Majority of people at school are bragging about sex and porn. Loads of people talk about this. I want to go to Nishkam High School but it's far away from my home. I've started GCSEs practice since September (2016) year9, and I think this will distract me a lot from learning. I've been having a major crush in school, I've liked this boy (also a Sikh and Keshdari). I've known him 8 years now. I don't know wether I truly like him or is this just lust in my head. He knows that I like him, but he doesn't know what he should do. I'm also known as ugly because of my ... (more)