Revision history [back]

To both of you, I first want to say a massive thank you for getting back and talking to me via the net. It means a lot that there are good people out there who won't judge my mistakes and let me feel like the world isn't going to come crashing down.

I understand both of you completely. While I know I shouldn't have read her messages, I was frustrated by lack of trust between us sisters because of her lying to me about certain things regarding him, and I was told off by my father for doing that. It was completely wrong and invasive, but I learnt so much about the nature of their relationship via that. I shouldn't have. I told my mum about the whole deal and together we have agreed to put this behind us and not talk about the messages and their details. Together we feel that we have to deal with the situation face to face and address it differently. While the messages made us realize how double sided this boy was, we know that we can't tell my sister but instead need to tackle it differently. And like you say strongKaur, we are going to let her make her own mistakes after talking to the boy. I think I need to completely let this go and just admit the mistakes I've made (I told my sister I was sorry for making her relationship hard) and let things go.

I also talked to my friend today, and she said that she would never ever say anything. She made me understand that the things we talked about were my venting and frustration and that whatever I told her (which was not about my sister) she would keep in confidence with her, and I trust that. So I'm praying to God that nothing goes wrong, and that my mum and I can talk to my sister and talk things out.

I never wanted to make my sisters life hard or muck up her relationship, that was never the intention. I never wanted for things to get worse I was just wanting her to not make a mistake. I think I didn't take the right path, and know I'm hoping I can fix that and make her realize that. I love her and want her to be with someone whose good. I never wanted her to think I've mucked her life up. And again like you say strongKaur, 10 years down the line I don't want her to blame me for letting her love go. I did tell her that I never wanted to make things bad I only wanted to make things good.

I'm hoping that my mum, her and I can talk about this soon. I don't want this to continue.

Thank you both for talking to me, it's made me feel a lot better. Lots of love x