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My friend don't be ac fool you are all ready beautifull those who bullied you were and will for ever more be ugly if you dress in the attire of a real gursikh you are never ugly! My. Freind t rue beauty is internal not outside to be honest you can't. Be that ugly no one is. Praying to be beautifull well someone can do so if they wish internally but not externally god made you the way you have been made except this other wise it is vanity and attachment you are praying for which is the foolish part don't be a fool Khalsa fateh