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My husband is Amritdhaari Sikh and he is divorcing me after domestic violence and abuse .i still believed that my husband loved me I can't let go of the feeling of love towards him

asked 2017-04-06 22:31:20 -0500

HBSingh gravatar image

My husband is Amritdhaari Sikh and he is divorcing me after domestic violence and abuse and making false criminal charges on me just fter 6 months of our marriage.. I was married here and came from India and was confiend at home for 6 months..there were many daily instances of differential treatment with me and of abuse with me daily..i still believed that my husband loved me but after he put me through the most horrible situation, i still can't let go fo the feeling fo love towards him..everyone is saying I am saved by Waheguru but why do i still want to be with..i still want to talk to him once..i was thrown out of their house in a demeaning way and still i have feelings for him..why? What should i do...he has applied for divorce too and i dont want to divorce him..i love him truly and i have no one to go back parents are not homeless in a foreign country..why did he do this to me after all this sikhi talk at his home and i was to take Amrit with him on this Baisakhi..why is this happening?

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i am not able to call to UK as i am usa and i am right now given food and shelter by senior citizens from my community as i was thrown out of my husband's house and i have no money and no one here in this country..what shud i tried talking to him and his family they are not listening

HBSingh16 gravatar imageHBSingh16 ( 2017-04-08 00:18:11 -0500 )edit

7 answers

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answered 2017-04-07 13:45:00 -0500

HBSingh16 gravatar image

please me through this dilemna

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answered 2017-04-07 14:40:15 -0500

gn gravatar image

I'm sorry to hear about your situation.

The first thing to do is Ardaas and ask Guru ji to guide you. You can also contact Sikh Helpline they deal with things like domestic abuse and have a 24-hour helpline

Stay strong and keep faith in Guru ji, I can't really provide an answer to help you but there are more active Sikh forums if you need help.

There are things about divorce on these forums so just do a quick search on them as well.

Sorry I couldn't help much.

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how do i call through using wifi as i am usa and dont know how to call on helpline number to uk

HBSingh16 gravatar imageHBSingh16 ( 2017-04-08 00:19:02 -0500 )edit

You can try using Skype or contact them on facebook/twitter. also you can send them a message.

gn gravatar imagegn ( 2017-04-08 09:11:38 -0500 )edit

They have Facebook messenger so message them on their

gn gravatar imagegn ( 2017-04-08 09:12:58 -0500 )edit

answered 2017-04-07 16:16:35 -0500

Cloud gravatar image

updated 2017-04-08 17:45:33 -0500

You still want to be with your husband because you are ill and suffering from Battered Woman Syndrome.

What you should do now is to call sikhhelpline like gn suggested.

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Sikh Helpline Saves Girl

Here Guruka explains about what Amrit is.

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Taking Amrit & Commitment

If you have any other questions please ask penji.


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answered 2017-04-27 21:29:47 -0500

strongKaur gravatar image

I am so sorry you are in this situation. I am sending you my love. Places that can help you with resources including women’s shelters (there are a lot of them) and even the police can help you find resources (even if you don’t want to press charges against him which is your right to do). It is very hard to understand how the person we love can hurt us so much. Sometimes when people treat us inconsistently we have hope that they will treat us better next time. I have a friend who works in this field and she says every woman who goes through domestic violence think that it could always have been worse, even though it was really bad already. I think you are so brave to share your story and ask for help. A lot of women who go through these situations do still feel love towards the person that hurt them. It is part of that cycle of abuse that keeps people going back. But you deserve so much more, I promise you. Do you have any friends, anyone at the Gurdwara that can help you? try to find a place in a shelter and they might be able to help you to find a job. We cannot say why he did this. It has nothing to do with you and it was not your fault. Love shouldn't hurt and it doesn't have to hurt.

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answered 2017-04-28 10:34:14 -0500

Guruka Singh gravatar image

Don't wait. Contact the Sikh Family Center NOW! They are here in the USA 408.800.SEVA (7382) You leave them a message and they will call back within 24 hours. If you are in an immediate emergency situation you must call 911.

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HBSingh16 gravatar imageHBSingh16 ( 2017-05-12 20:28:39 -0500 )edit


HBSingh16 gravatar imageHBSingh16 ( 2017-05-12 20:29:05 -0500 )edit

answered 2017-05-22 12:43:18 -0500

TS gravatar image

Relationships need equality. It is natural to feel helpless but I can assure you that this feeling will be short lived. Please do seek legal help. Your lawyer should be able to get your legal fees paid by your husband.

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Asked: 2017-04-06 22:31:20 -0500

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Last updated: May 22 '17