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Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh
A true Singh/Kaur will tell you that you are Guru Gobind Singh Ji son.
Your lucky you are a Sikh, Dhan Guru Nanak Dev Ji mahraj forgive the worst sinners such as thieves and cannibals. Don't beat yourself the only thing that is going to do is make you feel down and waste your time. At young ages lust is ver very strong as we grow older it changes to the other 4 thieves anger, greed, attachment and egotism.
The illusion will become clear once you start doing Waheguru simran and start doing some prayers. We can't fight it, only through Guru Ji's help can we control it.
There is no age in Sikhi the youngest Guru Dhan Sri Guru Harkrishan Sahib Ji become the Guru at the age of 5.
There is no one as merciful as Waheguru and Guru Ji where sinner they are the destroyer of sins. Many many many times Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji reminds how Waheguru and himself can destroy our sins even if they are as huge as mountains.
Just start doing some Waheguru simran, everything will become clear and better.
Also please stop crying, use your time to do something good like simran or sewa.
Please forgive me if i said anything wrong or offensive.
Sat Sri Akaal