Revision history [back]
 | 1 | initial version |
You are not alone in this, there are many others who also struggle with this and there is help available. You will need to work to replace this way of coping, with a different more healthy way for you. I urge you to seek professional help for that. You are not a failure. How other people see you is not a representation of you, but rather their own lens through which they see the world. It is a representation of themselves and their own journey and struggle. A lot of times people put others down to make themselves feel better about their own insecurities. My point being, that as hard as it is (and it has taken me a very long time to learn this), other people’s opinions of you do not matter. Even the most highly respected leaders, Granthis, etc. have people speaking against them, slandering, gossiping and attacking. Even people tried to kill the Bhagats like Kabir. So you need to just be yourself regardless of what other people think or say. You have value, your life has precious value. I believe it with my full heart. We are given this human life as a gift and even if you feel no one else is supporting you, I stand here with you. God is here with you. In high school I understand the difficult part is that school is such a big part of life and it can make life very difficult if you are being bullied. But life will not always be like this. This struggle is only temporary. In that respect it may help if there is someone you can speak to at the school, or change schools? Why are you in a new school? I think it would help if you also made some friends outside of school either in a club, sports, or extracurricular like volunteering, sewa etc. Spend time with sangat the Gurdwara Sahib if possible. Listen to prayers and Gurbani as much as possible because understanding Gurbani provides our mind with relief. Do Simran because it will help you make changes in your life as well. When you immerse yourself on that path, you will learn to love yourself and the life that has been given. I am proud of you for keeping your hair even though it sounds like it has been difficult. I know it is sometimes hard to reach out and I commend you for coming on this forum. I would suggest you talk to a doctor about arranging for some counselling as there is very specific counselling that helps to deal with self harm. They are fully trained in that area. In a crisis, try to call for help right away- 9-11 (in North America) or http://sikhhelpline.com/, local suicide hotline, U.S. - Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433). In the UK and Ireland - Call the Samaritans at 116 123 In Australia - Call Lifeline Australia at 13 11 14 In other countries - Visit IASP or Suicide.org. There are many ways to solve a problem, many options, even when your mind tricks you into thinking there is no way to end the pain. Gurbani tells us that you can cure this pain. I will make it clear- God is NOT trying to persuade you to kill yourself. God is forgiving, loving, compassionate, giver of life. No matter what, you like anyone else, has the change to merge with and meet God in this lifetime. Think about the things that make life worth living and what has helped you up to this point. Many people struggling like this can turn their lives around my friend. You can do it too. I encourage you to remove all possible ways you are thinking of ending your life, all dangerous means in your home, and staying away from alcohol, and staying in the company of people around you (not being alone). Talking about your problems may help as well with someone safe, or journaling.
| | 2 | No.2 Revision |
You are not alone in this, there are many others who also struggle with this and there is help available. You will need to work to replace this way of coping, with a different more healthy way for you. I urge you to seek professional help for that. You are not a failure. How other people see you is not a representation of you, but rather their own lens through which they see the world. It is a representation of themselves and their own journey and struggle. A lot of times people put others down to make themselves feel better about their own insecurities. My point being, that as hard as it is (and it has taken me a very long time to learn this), other people’s opinions of you do not matter. Even the most highly respected leaders, Granthis, etc. have people speaking against them, slandering, gossiping and attacking. Even people tried to kill the Bhagats like Kabir. So you need to just be yourself regardless of what other people think or say. You have value, your life has precious value. I believe it with my full heart. We are given this human life as a gift and even if you feel no one else is supporting you, I stand here with you. God is here with you. In high school I understand the difficult part is that school is such a big part of life and it can make life very difficult if you are being bullied. But life will not always be like this. This struggle is only temporary. In that respect it may help if there is someone you can speak to at the school, or change schools? Why are you in a new school? I think it would help if you also made some friends outside of school either in a club, sports, or extracurricular like volunteering, sewa etc. Spend time with sangat the Gurdwara Sahib if possible. Listen to prayers and Gurbani as much as possible because understanding Gurbani provides our mind with relief. Do Simran because it will help you make changes in your life as well. When you immerse yourself on that path, you will learn to love yourself and the life that has been given. I am proud of you for keeping your hair even though it sounds like it has been difficult. I know it is sometimes hard to reach out and I commend you for coming on this forum. I would suggest you talk to a doctor about arranging for some counselling counseling as there is very specific counselling counseling that helps to deal with self harm. They are fully trained in that area. In a crisis, try to call for help right away- 9-11 (in North America) or http://sikhhelpline.com/, local suicide hotline, U.S. - Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433). In the UK and Ireland - Call the Samaritans at 116 123 In Australia - Call Lifeline Australia at 13 11 14 In other countries - Visit IASP or Suicide.org. There are many ways to solve a problem, many options, even when your mind tricks you into thinking there is no way to end the pain. Gurbani tells us that you can cure this pain. I will make it clear-
- God is NOT trying to persuade you to kill yourself. yourself.
God is forgiving, loving, compassionate, giver of life. No matter what, you like anyone else, has the change chance to merge with and meet God in this lifetime. Think about the things that make life worth living and what has helped you up to this point. Many people struggling like this can turn their lives around my friend. You can do it too. I encourage you to remove all possible ways you are thinking of ending your life, all dangerous means in your home, and staying away from alcohol, and staying in the company of people around you (not being alone). Talking about your problems may help as well with someone safe, or journaling.