abcd's profile - activity

Bhai ji I just found out that my boyfriend got engaged to someone else. He didn't even feel the need to tell me or maybe it was too difficult for him to face me with that. I am sitting here stoned. after 9 years of love and nurturing in this relation.... It must be some karma that I had to pay :'(

Wow I am sorry I am not a registered/authorized person to answer your question. But you are making your life way too much complicated by worrying too much about what other's say or do. Just focus on "your" karma and "your" interaction with the cosmos. We are here for our journey and our relationship with the Infinite. Don't trap yourself in things that don't matter in the bigger picture.

Wow I am sorry I am not a registered or authorized person to answer your question. But you are making your life worrying too much about what other's say or do. Just focus on your karma and interaction with the ultimate cosmos. We are here for our journey and our relationship with the Infinite. Don't trap yourself in things that don't matter in the bigger picture.

Wow I am sorry I am not a registered or authorized person to answer your question. But you are making your life worrying too much about what other's say or do. Just focus on your karma and interaction with the ultimate cosmos. We are here for our journey and our relationship with the Infinite. Don't trap yourself in things that don't matter in the bigger picture.

Dear sister, I totally feel your pain. I was in a relationship for 9 years. In fact it would be 10 years this year in few months. In my case our religion, caste, social status, educational background, everything was compatible. Yet our parents disapproved. We both didn't want to go ahead with marriage if either of out parents were to object but since we were both professionally sound we didn't think it was possible. But there is something called "destiny" perhaps. I go through this cycle every single day, sometimes twice in a day.. it starts like praying and promising to be strong and think positive, than being indifferent (kind of struggling to suppress my mind from going back into memories of past) then relapsing into depressive mode, wanting him back, praying constantly and even questioning God, then i again give into destiny.. explain myself that i have to let it go and let God himselve solve my problem and meditate on true God. I repeat this almost every day and I wonder if Ill ever be able to let go. On the other hand my ex has already moved on. So it hurts me even more to see it was so easy for him but what can we do right? Sometimes I just stare at a quotation by Buddha that is to not to dwell in the memories of past, not to dream about future, but to concentrate on the present. This thought always helps me to let go for that moment when I try to focus on this quote but other than that I think just consciously letting go is the practice we must do every day and meditate more often. I just thought I'd share my experience with you. Though I know its not of much help. Sometimes, its good to know you are not the only one dealing with this. Guru Ang Sang.

Thank you Guruka Singh ji. Thank you very much. Please pray for me that I could follow the path you have shown. I try but only for so long and then relapse back into depressive thoughts. But I am not going to give up and everytime I fall short in my efforts I will get up and try again.

Just to add, as I read from your answer to someone else's post that If I do get married with someone else just for the sake of getting married or to give in to family and society pressures or to secure my inner fear of being alone for the rest of my life, I believe that marriage would be "karmic marriage". As you mentioned in that post. I do not want someone else to pay for my karma of falling in love so seriously that removing his identity from myself is like detaching my shadow from myself. I know I might sound like an obsessed person but we had great spiritual journey too. Whenever we had time we visited gurdwaras and everything, every moment felt so divine far far away from greed, lust, ego. It was just so divine. I can never love anyone else the same way or be the same person to anyone else. Not that I don't want to but it just doesn't come from within. What should I do?

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

WJWJF

My first prayer is already answered, Guruka singh ji. I have seen your videos on youtube and I respect your words a lot. I was hoping to get my answer from you and I got it. Thank you, I will do my best in following your suggestion. I am very humbled by your response. Thank you for understanding my situation and for your kind reply.

WJKWJF I am a 25 year old girl, I was in a relationship since last 9 years. My boyfriend was just a family now after being together for so many years. We shared great respect, comfort and true commitment all these years. Now that it was the time to justify our relation and commitment, I don't know what happened to him. He asked his mom for her permission for our marriage and her being old fashioned and orthodox, she refused. Now he is telling me to forget it. I don't understand how is this even happening. I love him so much that when it comes to him nothing else matters and he loves me a lot too but for some reason this thought has settled in his mind that since we cannot pay back our parents for making our life so perfect by sacrificing their own, he wants to pay her mom back by sacrificing our relation. I respect his mom even when she dislikes me to the extent that she hates me. I still tell him that I will prove myself to be total opposite of what she is afraid about but he does not want to take one step against the will of his mother. Because to him, his mother has made so many sacrifices over the years and he does not want to go ahead and marry me which will hurt her for rest of her life. After discussing this and trying to convince him for months now I am broken and torn apart. Every night I prayed to God Almighty to help me, to do some miracle that she agrees herself. But no answers. Then I thought I'll leave it on time and whatever is in my sanjog I'll get. I am in dilemma, isnt it like God help those who help themselves? Should I give up knowing he loves me as much as I love and accept this irrational reason of giving up? Although he clearly told me that he cannot marry me, he does not want to break up and neither it seems to be feasible from my side. We decide one day that fine we won't contact each othr from now and on. But we are so used to each other that it doesn't work. He messages me next morning and no matter how hard I try to resist it I end up replying back and then the cycle begins of initially talking and then discussing marriage, then he refuses, then I get hurt and disappointed, I pray, I cease the contact, and then he messages/ calls, then I try to resist, then I reply and so on. I feel I am stuck in this cycle and don't know what to do. Can you suggest me what should I do? This is really ruining my life.