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Confused and depressed about my rehat

WJKK WJKF yes I am confused At times I want to trim my beard Every morning when I leave for college I look at myself and say I want to trim it I keep thinking about it I keep asking myself is it because of my beard I have never been in a relationship
I have never been able to make great friends I can't talk to girls I think they will mock me regarding my hair They say Sikhs are special Sikhs are the privileged ones Then why are Sikhs subject to hate crimes Yes I am depressed because these things keep coming in my mind Maybe the questions I have asked aren't appropriate but I can't help it I can't keep them within me any longer I need help Before I had thought of cutting my hair but then slowly that idea went away Till now I have not removed even a single hair from my body but let me be very honest it's getting harder day by day Please help !!!!