me and my bf want to become a better person

asked 2015-08-06 03:02:32 -0500

miss k
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Me and my bf are tying our best to do paath n stay in rehat maryada.. We're both 21 years old. Before marriage we're trying to be good a person. For a better future ahead for both. we are even suggesting to become amritdhari as well. However. Me and my bf tend to argue allot. We discuss with each other that paath karnaa n stay in rehat maryada..

Dontt watch tv bcos on tv there's so Much negativity on what to watch n listen to. So on this process of being a Good person my bf feels really intimate I' have actually we both have agreed that' its wrong but the sexual feeling the hotness does not go away no matter how much we tend to do..not that' im bragging. we both always explain to each other its wrong. I feel like I've ggiven up on trying to be a good person. In this process I feel like there's nothing more I can do to help my bf or me. I was hoping for a ways or an opinion please. Thanks.
Waheguru jii always bless you.

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answered 2015-08-06 08:11:50 -0500

gn
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Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

It is good to hear you want to take Amrit and progress spiritually.

I am a year younger than you, and at our age Kaam (sexual desire) is strong. No matter how much we try, we can't get over it by our own strength only through Guru Ji kirpa can it clamed down.

The moment you both slip for even a slight second, is when things can go wrong.

Check out this video

My advice would be not to be alone in a room.

Its this reason many people say we should't date or we should only when where ready to get married. This why many families don't want to leave a gap between the engagement and marriage.

Please forgive me if i said anything wrong or offensive.

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Fateh

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answered 2015-08-07 17:25:40 -0500

miss k
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So basically having a bf is wrong. Against sikh maryada due to (kaam) and lust is a big problem. Knowing it's wrong. We're on the verge of getting married soon

Hopefully taking amrit before that MAharajj ji di kirpa naal.

What' about (kaam) having lust even when ur married n wish to do whenver ? Is that still kaam.. N Problem is at the moment we're trying soo hard to be a better person i mean we increased our daily routine to do extra paath go gurudwara more to be in a good environment n good sangat.

However after all that trying the feeling still comes.

Thanks for the answer before helped allot. Believe me. After both of us seeing that video link we realised n thought why this never came to our heads beforehand.

I need. More options to provide my bf as well.. its really hard to control a man in those terms at the moment.. He's got good sangat around him n he's being helpings himself by doing extra paath so Much.. but he can't control its really hard for him. N im sure being an amritdhari or not every man has that feelings as your stills human...

Thanks for all the help you have. Might be confusing so I apologise if it' has been. Thanks for the previous.. hopefully I'll get one afternoon this.. Bless!!.. Waheguru jii kirpa banaye rakhan.

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Check this post out http://answers.sikhnet.com/question/7899/please-answeri-beg-otherwise-this-thinking-will-make-me-die/#7900. Everyone gets these feelings, we can't get rid of them but with the Gurus math we can control them.

gn ( 2015-08-09 16:36:30 -0500 )edit

Its going to be hard controlling this, lay some rules down and stick to it. Sorry for the late reply.

gn ( 2015-08-09 16:39:52 -0500 )edit

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me and my bf want to become a better person

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