Drowning! in myself

asked 2014-03-12 11:23:53 -0500

Anonymous

updated 2014-03-27 13:39:51 -0500

Writing this is quite difficult for me as I feel ashamed of what I'm going to say right now. I have left my Guru quite while ago, I was confused and I didn't know what to do I was quit .. My question now is that if you don't have anymore answers left and you want to become one with your guru again then please tell me what I have to do, because i'm wandering around through my doubts continually and It's killing me I have Left My most Trenmendiscious and Beautiful Lord Please forgive my mistakes an in any writings of this. HElp, help, help me please to destroy me enemies. With much love, to this great and doing good deeds, keep u work I feel I'm continually beaten, I feel emtional wreck, I cannot do any good deeds, I have done more harm to anything and everything then I personally wanted or experienced I feel I'm in a unknowing state continiue, and I want harmony with my God back again as I have so much troubling with my oneself, innerself I cannot do anything at all, I feel powerless and i do no the differnce between good and bad, i have done more bad then i wanted and now i feel it's to late, i feel I am dum and a real stupid idiot that i have left the one and only thing that is really beautiful, iw wish I could go back reading my nitnem everyday but i have really , till my most regreat i have left it over and over for so many times and now i feel im standing nailed on the ground, idont know where to go run with my emotions as i connot control them and its making everything worse! its really ridiculious i want to go back on the good way, now and make a change as i am really confused i feel i cannot choose between right and wrong as i don know the difference so i cannot perform good deeds as i don know anymore what is is? help me please to find way, step by step i can get there , please forgive once more for the chaos.

answered 2014-03-28 11:08:35 -0500

This post is a wiki. Anyone with karma >100 is welcome to improve it.

Hi friend,

We all know the Bedawa ( disclaimer signed by the 40 liberated ones) when they left Guru Gobind Singh Ji and went home.They were then led by Mai Bhago to join the battle again and after the battle,when Sri Guru Gobind Singh Ji along with his Singhs was collecting the dead bodies for cremation, Guru Ji found one of them named Mahan Singh still clinging to life. On seeing Guru Ji, he made an effort to rise, then Guru Ji at once took him in his embrace, and sat down with him. Mahan Singh tearful and exhausted, requested the great Master to destroy the Bedahwa (the letter disclaiming) his being a Sikh of the Guru. and what did Guru Ji say before tearing the letter ? Guru showing infinite mercy,took the letter and flipped it to the blank side and said ' I never said you are not my Sikh,you chose to leave me' and all the Singhs got liberation.Take 1 step towards and rely on Guru Ji every second.Guru Ji is all forgiving remember, 'Nirvair' that's the greatness of Guru Ji and how can we praise Guru Ji?

(Charan Sharan Gur Ek painda jaye Chal Satgur Kot painda aage hoye leit hain) If a Sikh takes one step towards guru to take his refuge then the Guru advances to receive the Sikh by taking a million steps

My dear friend,recite this shabad with full faith,love and devotion and see for yourself how Guru Ji will lift you up and take you in his embrace.

Ab Hum chali Thakur peh haar (Now, I have come, exhausted, to my Lord and Master.)

Jab hum saran parabhoo kee aa-ee raakh parabhoo bhaavai maar (Now that I have come seeking Your Sanctuary, God, please, either save me, or kill me.)

Lokan kee chaturaa-ee upmaa tay baisantar jaar. (I have burnt in the fire the clever devices and praises of the world.)

ko-ee bhalaa kaha-o bhaavai buraa kaha-o hum tann dee-o hai dhaar (Some speak good of me, and some speak ill of me, but I have surrendered my body to You.)

jo aavat saran thaakur parabh tumree tis raakho kirpaa Dhaar. (Whoever comes to Your Sanctuary, O God, Lord and Master, You save by Your Merciful Grace)

jan naanak saran tumaaree har jee-o raakho laaj muraar. (Servant Nanak has entered Your Sanctuary, Dear Lord; O Lord, please, protect his honor)

Waheguru mehr karn

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