bhai sahib ji,first i matha tekh to you gurkhalsaji.
ok,
it seems that the way that you are running your rehat is like a list rather then you. am i right?
the gueu has given us a form a way of life that we have to adopt to shed the habbots of the prvious thus we are born again without a head.
you have consumed your rehat in an almost ritualistic pattern and i sence you feel bored or not alive.
for forty days i suggest you say the name of god with every morsel of breath apart from when doing bani.and your mind will ajust.
but if i have scensed wrong then you have a sence of longing within your heart to be somewhere far away with the guru rather then stuck in the negative circle of social life.when i feel like this it seems that i am missing bir rass so i go staright to chandi di vaar to awaken the soul and scare away miya.
you want to feel satisfied. let me give you a hukhnama from Dasam sri guru Granth sahib ji.
from ang 30
ਭੁਜੰਗ ਪ੍ਰਯਾਤ ਛੰਦ ॥
BHUJANG PRAYAAT STANZA
ਨਮੋ ਸੂਰਜ ਸੁਰਜੇ ਨਮੋ ਚੰਦ੍ਰ ਚੰਦ੍ਰੇ ॥
Salutation to Thee O Sun of suns! Salutation to Thee O Moon of moons!
ਨਮੋ ਰਾਜ ਰਾਜੇ ਨਮੋ ਇੰਦ੍ਰ ਇੰਦ੍ਰੇ॥
Salutation to Thee O King of kings! Salutation to thee O Indra of Indras!
ਨਮੋ ਅੰਧਕਾਰੇ ਨਮੋ ਤੇਜ ਤੇਜੇ ॥
Salutation to Thee O Creator of pitch darkness! Salutation to Thee O Light of lights.!
ਨਮੋ ਬ੍ਰਿੰਦ ਬ੍ਰਿੰਦੇ ਨਮੋ ਬੀਜ ਬੀਜੇ ॥੧੮੫॥
Salutation to Thee O Greatest of the great (multitudes) Salutation to Three O Subtlest of the subtle ! 185
ਨਮੋ ਰਾਜਸੰ ਤਾਮਸੰ ਸਾਂਤਿ ਰੂਪੇ ॥
Salutation to Thee O embodiment of peace! Salutation to Thee O Entity bearing three modes!
ਨਮੋ ਪਰਮ ਤੱਤੰ ਅਤਤੰ ਸਰੂਪੇ ॥
Salutation to Thee O Supreme Essence and Elementless Entity!
ਨਮੋ ਜੋਗ ਜੋਗੇ ਨਮੋ ਗਿਆਨ ਗਿਆਨੇ ॥
Salutation to Thee O Fountain of all Yogas! Salutation to Thee O Fountain of all knowledge!
ਨਮੋ ਮੰਤ੍ਰ ਮੰਤ੍ਰੇ ਨਮੋ ਧਿਆਨ ਧਿਆਨੇ ॥੧੮੬॥
Salutation to Thee O Supreme Mantra! Salutation to Thee O highest meditation 186.
ਨਮੋ ਜੁਧ ਜੁਧੇ ਨਮੋ ਗਿਆਨ ਗਿਆਨੇ ॥
Salutation to Thee O Conqueror of wars! Salutation to Thee O Fountain of all knowledge!
ਨਮੋ ਭੋਜ ਭੋਜੇ ਨਮੋ ਪਾਨ ਪਾਨੇ ॥
Salutation to Thee O Essence of Food ! Salutation to Thee O Essence of Warter !
we recite this every day. do you remember from where?
what do you think guru ji is telling you
It's good that you are doing Naam Japna (praying) but you are missing 2 other things which every sikh has to do, kirat karni (earn an honest living) and wand chakna (sharing with the less fortunate) and also if you do have job do take out daswandh (10% of your income to give to charity).
not exactly my freind i think he does those things...