cant do path anymore...what to do.?

I was..infact i am a sabat soorat (non amritdhari)ambitious guy,,,for whom a good career and stable life and giving happiness to parents was more important. Life has been full of ups and downs, family earning is hand to mouth, and never did i expect or forced parents to give money for unnecessary leisure of mine. Have seen HARSH REALITIES of a middle class family. I had a dream of becoming army officer since childhood. worked very hard, did engineering from reputed inst and later achieved my goal in 2015 by getting selected in army as an officer. yess, ashirwaad and ardaas of parents and my NANI has always been there with me(atleast till the time i was not selected--i used to think like this only ) . i started my military training,injuries are part of it. few months after i got injured and had to start my training again since i missed enough days in previous term. i recovered well from previous injury but still was kept under observation by doctors for 2-3 months and was adviced not to do any kind of hard/physical work. One bad day came when my physical training instructor forced me to do some sort of physical training, something just happened and i ended up with disability of left arm on 12 may 2016.

one year..........believe me....one year i spent in hospital.....doctors did various experiments on the name of my treatment........but perhaps my mind was somewhere lost in dark...trying to find and question waheguru about this. I used to wake up at 5, did ishnan and dukhbhanjni sahib shabads followed by 5 japuji sahib paths, afternoon-sukhmani sahib and rehras in the evening.i used to read question answers on this blog regarding my doubts on path, regarding how to concentrate more during path. Days were passing, doctors used to come on rounds, many young doctors appreciated for my PATIENCE ..being so calm and spending time without losing my composure. . officially doctors though declared me UNFIT FOR SERVICE...still there was a regular procedure of giving your OWN JUSTIFICATION ABOUT WHY I SHOULD NOT BE THROWN OUT OF SERVICE which i wrote and waiting for reply from higher authorities in delhi. . unofficially, my parents, specially my mom left no stone unturned to approach each and every political leader at higher level to beg for my career. one day there was a hope given to us and the other day it shattered when we used to hear "sorry ..rules allow nahi karte". . each day i used to cry in alone...during path...used to curse myself........begging from waheguru.....questioning him about my mistake but as if waheguru was/is so selfish that he is intentionally ignoring me and destroyed my. . we tried out best.....approached every minister at higher level......no positive response from that side....military doctors just handed over to me a disability certificate and sent me home declaring me unfit for military. its been ... (more)