kaurchic's profile - activity

You are quite young. In college. Exploring different courses and trying to find yourself amongst all the pressures youth your age come into contact with. I can tell you right now. It takes dedication, perseverance, time, effort, and a lot of hard work to complete a diploma or degree. You really just need to tell yourself that this is what I'm going to do - no matter what and then, just go for it. It's up to you.

If your struggling with time management - not knowing how to manage all the assignments, papers, labs, midterms, and exams then try to set up a system for yourself - whether its using a colour coding system, using an agenda, printing out calendars, having a bulletin board in your room, etc. Figure out a system and then do what works for you. If your not enjoying the major you selected, I would suggest going to Student Services or Career Services and setting up an appointment with someone to help you select an appropriate major well suited for your interests and abilities.

It's probably one or both of these problems. It starts with priorities and you need to select your priorities by placing health and school at the highest level if you want to succeed. Your choice. Your success. Your happiness.

I hope you make the right choice.

Given the situation, it sounds like these are very unfortunate circumstances. Her parents don't want to care for her anymore because of cultural shame. This is very disappointing to me. Although I am very glad to see the Gurdwara has agreed to take care of her and the baby. I would suggest her visiting a Women's Centre for additional support and counseling as she is going through this process. She needs counseling. She needs help with dealing with the loss of her parents as she is bringing new life into this world. Very ironic and saddens me. She is dealing with a new lifestyle with being apart of the sangat. This will take some time to get used to. It is an adjustment. She is only 17. Very young. She needs the additional support to help her get through all of this. I looked up gurpuri.org and it seems like a very nice place.

What I would suggest, depending on how severe your depression is. You may be experiencing some signs and symptoms, so the best method is to consult a doctor or counselor who will provide some alternative methods on how to become more in control of your thoughts and feelings. It is very empowering to say to yourself that: You are in control of your thoughts and emotions. That is the first step in conquering depression. Depression doesn't control you.

Next, listen to Gurbani. It is helpful in moving through your situation. In addition, Gurbani is a symbol of gratitude and when you embrace Naam it is as if you are sending positivity everywhere in your house. Guru Nanak Dev Ji said, it is a girls responsibility to learn the importance of Naam and how that will benefit yourself and those around you. Let the words and the sound of the music come inside you and let that transcend you into a more spiritually happier person. Gurbani is a form of inner peace of what your situation and circumstances are - acceptance and then moving on.

Try keeping a journal and make note of the affects Gurbani has had on your spiritual health. Note your thoughts and emotions. Have you noticed any significant impact or change? Are you feeling more happier inside? Are your thoughts positive? Are your emotions changing from negative to positive? This is called emotional dysregulation to emotional regulation once emotions and thoughts are congruent - lined up or in balance. In other words, after listening to Gurbani, are your thoughts matching up with your emotions? Therefore, positive thoughts must equal positive emotions in order to obtain equilibrium in your mind and body. Seeking harmony.

This should be the ultimate goal for listening to Gurbani and this will be the focus of your practice. Keep listening. Keep the practice. Keep the diligence. Naam is yours. Your relationship. No one can interfere in your practice of Naam. Remember this as you begin.

When injustice is done, both sides of the equation need to be analyzed. Real life involves facing the truth but also evaluating your inner self.

I think it depends on the reason and on what terms you are leaving. If it is for school, marriage, to travel (missionary work, teaching, volunteering abroad) or for a better opportunity for work; then yes you should do what makes you happy.

Leave on good terms. Explain to your parents why you are leaving and how this will benefit your character.

Have your parents be involved in the process. For example, ask them to help you plan, or be involved in the decision process, or help you make better decisions.

This will grow your relationship with them.

Just make sure while you are away to talk on the phone all time and show them how to do video chats okay :) :)

No. That is taking care of yourself. It is self-care and being good to yourself in all aspects of your form.

Do not fear anyone or hate anyone. By feeling these types of emotions it is going to give you more hurt. The best advice I could possibly give, is form open and honest communication with the person you are wishing to establish a relationship with. Also form open and honest communication with your parents too. Do not be afraid to talk about your feelings with your parents. In fact, that is probably how you wish to raise your own children. The only way that is going to happen is by you (the parent) providing that warm environment for your child to be comfortable enough to reveal or disclose some things to you. I'm sure every parent is dying to have that kind of relationship with their child, especially when they start dating.

Don't let some dis-settlements in relationships keep you from finding the right person that matches your ideals, morals, values, personality style, and the way you envision raising your children. Be confident with who you are and be proud of your upbringing. It has made you who you are and that's very important in constructing an intimate relationship with another person.

Also you mentioned that you were serious with one person for a very long time and talking to new people is very different and difficult for you. Tell the person this. They might be experiencing the same feelings, but someone has to be willing to break the ice. I know you might be worried about your future with finding a life partner and having children, but don't let this worry you. Enjoy your life as it is at this very moment.

If you don't want to see your parents fighting then you need to talk to them so they know you care about them and yourself. It's very important.

You will know when you have found that person to share your life with. I know you may have heard this before, probably plenty of times, but it is true. It is a feeling of experiencing good, healthy boundaries and honest communication with another person who understands you for you! So don't let things discourage you in any way.

You are an adolescent, soon to be developing into a young lady with this comes hormonal and physiological changes of the body. I would keep close attention on how hair growth is reacting to this process. If you feel uncomfortable and you have spoken to your parents, then remove the hair. It is your choice and your comfort level.

From my understanding of what dissociation is as it relates to psychiatry and as it relates to cultural differences, it is very similar to attachment/detachment and maintaining a balance between worldly affairs and your inner self. Maintaining balance means achieving homeostasis or equilibrium within your inner self. It is healthy and necessary to detach from others to reconnect with yourself by living a householders life and then rebuilding connections. You need this to sustain healthy relationships with others, while living your day to day life. This is a vital teaching in Sikhi and an individual must understand this teaching in order to live a happy and healthy lifestyle. It is necessary to sustain ones life.

Dissociation relates to psychiatry when an individual has completely lost connection and association with oneself. This person has lost connection with reality and the inability to disipher between real and unreal within their own consciousness.

First, I'm sure your parents already know. Mata and Pita see all and know all about their children, even if you are not aware of it yourself.

You have to tell them the truth to lead an honest life that will be more fulfilling. When you were a child, you obeyed and lived according to their rules. They guided and directed you according to the Guru's teachings as best as they could.

Now you are entering into college/university - a defining moment in your life filled with challenges but also a journey full of enjoyment. The task at hand for you is to develop more into your identity. Build good morals, beliefs, and hold strong to what you believe in. Have fun. Learn. Grow and Develop. Experience life. Exchange knowledge. Do your best. Focus on your studies.

Don't get caught up and influenced by your peers. By that I mean engaging in reckless behavior and not focusing on your studies. Your parents raised you to do well in school so you must honor that.

Everything else - according to Sikhism rules. Do what your able. Be true to yourself. Ask yourself....can I stop eating meat? Does this go against what I believe in? Can I cut my hair? Does this go against what I believe in? Take a good look at yourself and ask yourself these questions? Respect your parents rules while you are living in their house. That's not leading a double life. It is a sign of understanding for the way your parents raised you, the values they instilled, and not forgetting what they have taught you.

Your going to be taking a lot of different courses so expand your horizons. Take a philosophy course - learn more about God and how God is explained from that school of thought. If it is of any interest to you. Take a religion studies course.

Your parents will accept you for who you are. You need to accept you. Tell the truth. Once you tell the truth, you won't be living a double life anymore. You will find yourself in being truthful.

If you want to live your life without being held down than do it. You answered your own question. This is the direction you are heading in so own it. Explain your perspective with integrity to your parents. Trust me. They will understand.

Regarding Nitnem, there will come a point in your life when you will miss it and will want to recite your prayers and even listen to Gurbani. That will stay apart of your life forever, especially if you grew up listening when you were a child.

All the time. No body even has to know because it is your self talk or internal talk.

In some respect, yes shastar is the guru's guru, or the extension of the Sikh. But in actuality, Vaheguru is everywhere. Therefore, Gurbani is in the heart of the guru's teachings and one must abide by those teachings to live a moralistic life. Pray in the light or in the sun. Open the windows.

In full meaning, the Chaurasi Lakh Joon is the 84 000 life forms or life times that exist on the planet earth. Jap Ji Sahib paath is synonymous to this belief. You must recite Vaheguru 84 times or Mool Mantr 84 times to get out of the cycle. Although one will never enter the cycle if they are wise of the aforementioned paath. Knowledge of this paath is very important in one's life, and even understanding the meaning of this paath. Transferring of this information is of great value to those who need it. God Bless You!

In English:

If you want to see the brave, look to those who can return love when given hatred. If you want to see the heroic, look to those who know the eternal truth, but will choose forgiveness. This represents eternal virtue.

There is nothing lost or wasted in this life. Only spiritual gain of value and virtue.

Listen to your intuition. If you are feeling already that there maybe some sort of conflict. These are the steps to follow: First, speak to the person your seeing. Talk to that person about their thoughts pertaining to what your concerns are and try your best to communicate maturely. Come to an agreement, compromise, or consensus. Secondly, talk to your parents separately and try to figure out what their honest views are. Thirdly, suggest to the person who you are seeing to speak to their parents as well. Bring up the discussion about caste and see where it leads. Be clear about what the both of you want to your parents and try to understand each other. Set the mood by making tea and appetizers. Concentrate on your studies. It is of most importance.

Toon mere pita tu hai mere mata. Waheguru Ji tussi meher kari.

It is Ik Onkar - One God.