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waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh

i am 22 year old amritdhari singh and i have done some sin full things and i need serious suggestions as the whole khalsa panth is our family so i am going to admit my mistakes in front of everyone and after reading this post i want any five singhs to give me a punishment

i am amritdhari from last 8 years but first five years i dont know much about sikhi because noone explains me not even my family so first five year i done so many sin full tings like diff gf agter some time and all the stuff but in last 3 years i meet some chardikala singhs and they taught me what sikhis and how to follow but about a year ago i meet a amritshari singhni on fb and fall in love with her and after sometime we got in relationship but after some time we have arguments so we solve it and every month different argument fights i forgot to mention its a long distance not living

and after some time i try to change myself whatever she says i have done it but after 8 months i start flirting with other girls on fb and she finds out and we fight and i promis to not to do it again but after some time i got msg from one singhni whom i used to like back and she sk me to get in relationship with her and i say yes to her and sometime my mind gose to lust full things after some days i felt wrong and left her and get back with my first singhni and after a month i got msg from tht singhni again but this time my first singhni read tht msg and we have big big fight and she left me

i am trying to get back with my frst singhni because she always puch me towards guru and she try to make me a good person but now she dont believe in me and i am trying to tell the truth whatever she ask and really want to marry her and want to be her life patner but now she says she in not interested in any relation but i dont want to loose her and i am keep asking her to give me one chance but she is not doing it i am keep asking waheguru ji for forgivness and do ardass to waheguru ji to give me back my singhni i promis gurusahib as well that i will not anything like that ever again but she i still not convinced i love her alot i felt her pain

what will i do that se would belive in me i dont know please tell me suggest me i write down my entire story i am crying everyday when i think back why i have done those things i dont know pleaseeee anyone help me

my entire family know abut her and my family know i want to get married with her please help me