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no more believe in God

asked 2016-08-30 19:42:18 -0500

Simar2204 gravatar image

updated 2016-08-31 13:22:45 -0500

Guruka Singh gravatar image

I belong to a Guru Sikh family. Never had a haircut, goes to gurudwara and do path. I love a boy. as much as I love my parents and I want to marry him. He was there with me when I made a failed attempt of suicide and now my parents say that he is not good for me because a pundit said that I will not live happily if I go for a love marriage but if it will go for an arranged marriage then I will be living the happiest life. my grandmother says that if we are getting some warnings from pundits then we should get aware. I pray twice a day always asking God to give me a happy life with him but now it seems like God is not listening to me. He is playing games with me. Today I am feeling so bad that I always worshipped one god, never asked for anyone's bad and love someone but God is pretending to see me silently and making fun of mine. Today I am leaving the path of God because God cannot do anything against a pundit. I give up....!!!! I Give up my faith in God and my faith in prayer.

Kindly please do not post me those videos. I will appreciate that.

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answered 2016-09-04 22:53:32 -0500

strongKaur gravatar image

Dear Simar2204, I read some of your old posts to understand your situation. I will summarize as: You are from a gursikh family in Canada who doesn’t agree to your marriage to your boyfriend, who is an international student. Their excuses include his looks, status, pandit predictions, etc. Pandit has even said don’t pray or go to gurdwara. Your grandma says listen to the pandit, and don’t do love marriage. You feel God isn’t listening to your prayers and therefore have given up faith.

From your parents perspective we can understand that they are looking out for your best interest and want you to be happy and they’ll do whatever they can to make that happen. I mean no disrespect to your family, but even though they are gursikh they are not practicing what we have been taught in gurbani. Your family is listening to pandits, which we do not follow in sikhi. The pandit has told you not to pray or go to gurdwara. This should put a red flag in your head that anything he is saying is obviously wrong. Did any religious person ever tell someone not to pray or remember God? Secondly, your parents are making excuses like “his looks” or “status.” We should see all as equals. In sikhi we do not judge by caste, creed, status, etc. We see all as God equally. (by the way you’re not alone. I’ve had problems with my parents believing in superstitions, talking about malwa vs. dwaba, black magic and stuff like that too and I’m Canadian as well. There are times I’ve chosen to stay quiet but lately I’ve been speaking up more that this is not per sikhi. They’ve come around on a couple of topics but its hard to change people’s thinking especially when cultural values that clash with religious teachings have been present for so long. Nonetheless its been useful to have discussions with them about things because they are, very slowly, changing. Sometimes I make them listen to kathas where they talk about stuff like that. Education helps! But it takes a lot of courage to assert yourself against your parents. took me a long time).

So now dealing with the issue of faith. I have gone through a period in my life when I gave up faith and found it again. I’m going to explain a little bit of what I have learned about God and prayer because I didn’t understand this until recently either. God created maya. Maya includes our thoughts (worries, anxieties, hopes, wishes, desires are called rajogun thoughts. Lust, anger, greed, attachment, and pride are called tamogun thoughts, and compassion, contentment, tolerance, humility, moral control are satogun thoughts) and everything physical in this world. Kaal is the entity that is the governor of maya and everything kaal gives us in life is due to past karma. When we pray for things in our life, we ... (more)

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Thank u for your reply. It is really helping me. I'm a kind of person who can neither live without her parents nor her boyfriend. I just want my parents to agree for him. Neither he drinks, no drugs and even works hard. I don't understand what is wrong.

Simar2204 gravatar imageSimar2204 ( 2016-09-05 15:18:57 -0500 )edit

im glad it helped. i hope your parents can come around and can move past this whole "pandit" problem.

strongKaur gravatar imagestrongKaur ( 2016-09-05 19:20:16 -0500 )edit
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answered 2016-08-31 13:20:21 -0500

Guruka Singh gravatar image

Why should a Pandit know any more than you?

"After all their reading, the Pandits, the religious scholars, and the astrologers argue and debate. Their intellect and understanding are perverted; they just don’t understand. They are filled with greed and corruption. Through 8.4 million incarnations they wander lost and confused; through all their wandering and roaming, they are ruined." - Guru Nanak Dev Ji ANG 27.

Your spiritual relationship is your own relationship with yourself, your soul, God and Guru. No one has any right to interfere in that relationship.

Now is the time to work on yourself, to develop your own discipline, your own daily sadhana and habit to go deeper into Gurbani.

That is the only thing that will carry you through this. The Guru will arrange your relationships and your marriage IF YOU LET HIM and don't let your emotions or any other person get in the way. How to do that? Focus on your own discipline. Learn to meditate and do it every day. Learn the meaning of Gurbani and let understanding emerge.

It's not about "God" or "religion." It's about you.

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Thank u for ur reply but the thing is my grandmother who is always doing Path said that a Pundit said if I will go for love marriage then I won't live a happy life and if we r getting warnings then y not to consider it. even if i force them then after marriage if something bad happen they won't come

Simar2204 gravatar imageSimar2204 ( 2016-09-01 12:21:49 -0500 )edit

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Asked: 2016-08-30 19:42:18 -0500

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Last updated: Sep 04 '16