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In dire need of guidance.. please help Sangatji

asked 2019-02-11 23:43:24 -0600

JustMe gravatar image

updated 2019-02-12 11:39:51 -0600

Guruka Singh gravatar image

An awful incident has transpired in my family. My sister, brother-in-law, and 2 year old nephew live in our house. They have been living with us for the past 3 years.

Today my sister’s husband attempted to sexually abuse my 14 year old sister. Thankfully,I came upstairs on time.

He keeps lying that he didn’t do anything but, I know my little sister wouldn’t lie and she was clearly very freaked out.

My entire family is in distress because of this compelling situation. My sister refuses to believe her husband would do such a thing and is threatening to leave with my nephew.

My family dearly loves my nephew and we are aware of her husbands abuse nature. We are very uncertain about her and the babys safety and future if they leave. But of course we cant keep them when his mind is so filthy.

I worry about little sisters psychological state and how this can impact her future and wellbeing. I fear if I ask her too many questions she’ll begin to feel the weight of the situation as I feel she doesn’t fully comprehend the extents of what happened. I’m very heartbroken and so is my family. What are we suppose to do? What should I do? There are so many lives at stake. This situation truly breaks my heart.

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answered 2019-02-12 11:17:14 -0600

Guruka Singh gravatar image

Please, do not remain silent. If this has happened once, the chance that it will happen again is too high. As Strong Kaur said, safety is the first priority here. These things must be confronted and not hidden because of shaming within the community. Your sister needs to feel safe, protected and supported. That is the number one priority.

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answered 2019-02-12 01:40:30 -0600

strongKaur gravatar image

This must be incredibly distressing. I understand your desire to keep your family together, but the utmost first principle here is safety and doing what is just. I would recommend going to the police and reporting what you saw and what happened. Regardless of whether your sister would like to, but you need to do what is right here. Request of your sister to stay with you until things are sorted out. The police can provide for their safety from him. For your sister’s psychological state, the police has something called victim services. They are counsellors who help them through these types of situations. People do heal from these types of circumstances but it can take a long time and she may be acutely very unwell so support her as best you can. Don’t ask her too much, just listen to what she has to say in the time she wants to say it. Give her a space in which to be able to share it. I know you are all heartbroken, but the right thing to do is report it and let the police sort it out. You're all not safe.

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answered 2019-02-13 16:03:49 -0600

Tarran Singh gravatar image

Absolutely as these two guys have said. StrongKaur gave most good answer, and Babaji also great as well. Safety first and calling the police and protection services.

We will all do Ardas and benti as well that you can be safe and that Guru Ji can protect you from future situations and help healing to take place. Let us stay in the safety of Maharaj and Sangat.

Love and support for you at this time.

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Asked: 2019-02-11 23:43:24 -0600

Seen: 71 times

Last updated: Feb 13