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Worried about future

asked 2018-07-19 13:32:22 -0500

Kour gravatar image

updated 2018-07-20 10:31:16 -0500

Guruka Singh gravatar image

So I’m currently in 11 grade and idk what I wanna do or become in my future . Since childhood my parents always talks about going into medical field so I never thought of anything else . I was like okay ima be a nurse/ doctor whatever . Before I was little but now it’s the time to actually decide bc we soon have to choose the subjects/ clg accordingly.

So the problem is that since childhood I have social anxiety. I also have low confidence issues. I m not comfortable with most of the people . I m not even comfortable with half of my family . I hate seminars my hands starts sweating and anxiety keeps coming . I can’t overcome my anxiety it’s been so long . It’s not like I’m running away from this bc I can’t . At school there r seminars , group activities, public speaking etc that u have to do and it didn’t overcame my anxiety. Every time it got worse.

One of the reason for this low self confidence is that I’m ugly ;) yes lol well I used to be so cute and pretty in my childhood but now . And I have been bullied several times as well . My nose is crooked and I have the type of typical indian parents that won’t ever let me have plastic surgery . I mean it’s not a small thing either . I had Pneumonia in 2013 and since then I lost all my weight and developed eating disorders etc and couldn’t regain my weight since then .

The two things hurted me the most : This summer when we were on vacation in India I got a little sick and we went to the doctor and the doctor said in the end “bhaar vadhala nai taan munda ni koi changa labhna “ (gain weight or else u won’t be able to find a good life partner ) The second thing that broke my heart even more my cousin was like oh what u wanna become I was like umm doctor and he was like yea sure I knew after u become a doctor first Fix urself (ur crooked nose, back etc .)

The thing is I don’t have anything else in mind . My parents also want me to go in med field . I wanna work in the ER. But maybe my face won’t let me . And my anxieties . I don’t even have any interest in studies anymore . If only I was pretty I would have done so many activities at schoo like join Bhangra theatre etc . But my looks r stopping me from chasing my dreams . I guess I’m paying for my sins rn .

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answered 2018-07-19 15:41:55 -0500

Guruka Singh gravatar image

updated 2018-07-19 15:50:09 -0500

Dear one, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The only way to get out of your predicament is to go in. You know your surface (body, emotions, face) but you have not yet made friends with your own soul. Do not worry about finding a soulmate. Find your own soul. Your soul is your soul mate. As long as you stay on the surface, you will torture yourself with your own low self-esteem. Find your true beauty. Meditate and do Paath every day. Breathe deeply with your eyes closed. Meditate on Naam with your breath. Make the connection. Do the work and develop the habit to prioritize getting up earlier and spending time every morning in meditation. It's time to go deeper. Once you do the work, Guru Ji will bring you your Sadhsangat.

You may like this video. "Why Do You Worry?"

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answered 2018-07-20 22:37:54 -0500

Tryingtobasikh gravatar image

Waheguru Ji Ki Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

Meri pyaari behen ji, listen, you'll find that everyone is judged for how they look and even the most prettiest get called horrible things. Do not worry about your nose ( I know it can be hard, I have some confidence issues too, so, I understand). The right man will love your personality and the world will bow down to work you've down for the society. By becoming a doctor or nurse or anything else, you'll help humanity and blessings are the most important thing! Don't worry about the weight issue, try exercising at home after stretching for 10 minutes (follow a nice balanced routine). This will help tone you up and make your physique look straight and excellent. However, no need to blame yourself for anything, everything is god's gift. When you work hard on yourself, love yourself and reach great heights, everyone will appreciate you way more too. It's just how society works (charde suraj nu salaam). I think you're beautiful, after you get more into gurbani, you'll see crazy amount of beauty in yourself too :) Stay calm, read gurbani and find beauty in simple things, don't believe anything negative. OH and note this! (YOUR PERSONALITY SEEMS AWESOME! remain kind). Bhul Chuk muaf karni. Waheguru mehr banai rakhan.

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Asked: 2018-07-19 13:32:22 -0500

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Last updated: Jul 20