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Everyone has been given this life "human body" to attain that jeevan which will unite us back with Akal Purakh Waheguru.

So please don't think too much about these thoughts instead focus your energy on doing small things that will lead you to Guru Ji's path...like reading books about the jeevan of Gurmukhs or anything that will bring you closer to Him.

I think everyone gets these thoughts which make us feel guilty in one way or the other...so I try to put gurbani or kirtan on my phone before I sleep so that I fall asleep whilst listening to it.

This time of Kaljug does not want us to get close to Waheguru Ji so there will obstacles but we have WAHEGURU Ji, Sadhsangat and Guru SAhib Ji's kirpa to ferry us across....

Please don't worry...as I'm going through the same...God Bless you...