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Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh! I am sorry for bothering you again but I tried every way of getting over this past but instead of improving things are only becoming more difficult. My parents want me to think about getting married sometime soon this year. According to them in Indian culture a girl should ideally get married by the age of 25-26. I agree to this somewhat having a science background I understand to it's biologically more favorable to have have kids before the age of 30. Therefore if I do want to get into the married life and plan to have children this is ideal age. However I am so torn inside. I still love him and the thought of anand karaj with someone else is killing me inside. I know nothing could be done. He is already getting involved with his family to look for a potential match for him and this is hurting me even more. I want to do the same but I can't move on. I am terrified to live alone but at the same time I cannot forget the time we spent together. I want to live up to every promise we made to each other. I do know that back then he meant every word he said to me and so did i. He wants to serve his mother in this life and for that he has to deject me. He told me clearly without sugar coating his words. It makes me respect him but I am also hurt that why isn't waheguru helping me through this. I don't want to marry someone knowing that I still love him. I don't know what should I do? The pressure of getting married is increasing every day from my side of the family too. They don't know that I am still in denial about my break up. I know I am in denial/grief stage and I also hope that with time hopefully I'll be able to move on. But if I decide to stay single at the moment, will it be right decision to take? I don't want to be alone but when I try to get to know someone I feel like I am betraying them as well as my guru for not living up to promises I once made in front of Dhan Shri Guru Granth Sahib ji. I tried to meet a guy that my parents suggested but as soon as we were given our own space to get to know each other I felt like I was a married woman trying to know a stranger. I felt the guilt and indifferent emotion towards the guy I was arranged to meet with. I did not feel that he could be my potential partner I felt I was already a married woman although I am not. No one understands the dilemma I am going through because I and my ex were not married yet but we were no less than a couple - for 9 years we stood by each other in rain and in sunshine. Everything was perfect I don't know how to deal with this. I was recovering from loosing him but now the challenge is to bring someone else to take his place in my life and its worse that I could have imagined. Please guide me through this process. I would appreciate it very much if you do ardas to Guru Granth Sahib ji so some miracle can change him and bless him and allow us to find some solution so we could be together again. Please if you can fold your hand and ask guru ji to help me reunite with my true love. I will be indebted to you for life for doing this for me whether or not this ardas be heard.